
What’s a red flag? It is a warning sign that your partner is probably nuts and you should dump them. Most people are completely love blinded and ignore major red flags until about a year and a half into the relationship when they sit awake and wonder "how did I miss these red flags?" Let me help you out. Here is a list of major red flags for you to look out for when you're completely love drunk.
They show you their family photo album and it’s all stock photos – yikes, need I say more?
They say they’re going to meet their friends for lunch and pictures of them partying in Tahiti pop up in your social media feed
If your partner says they’re going out to “do some things” and don’t return for 7 days
If they call you before texting and then leave you voicemail and then ask you to call you back and give you a landline phone number - what the actual f**k?
If they leave for the gym and come back with a pony
If you open their underwear drawer and it’s full of red flags
If they play videos from their phone on full volume in public – this is actually the first sign of a sociopath
If they say they’re starting a podcast – run!
If they wear boat shoes but don’t own a boat
If they have a dishwasher but prefer to hand wash dishes - what are they hiding??
If they cut the crust off sandwiches and then just eat the crust – I’m not necessarily sure how this would affect your relationship but this is just a problem
Own more than one pair of corduroy pants
If they know how to pronounce the correct sizes at Starbucks
If they enjoy waiting in line - anywhere
If they get mad you won’t answer your phone when you’re sitting across from them
If they still go to the mall – what are they stuck in 2002?
Their favorite restaurant is Applebees
They start talking to you about cryptocurrency
They hum to themselves while walking around
If they don’t light a candle after taking a #2 – this shows a lack of consideration for your well-being
Uh-oh, I forgot I put 21 signs. So...hmm. I'm running out of ideas - if they hold up a red flag, run!
This list is definitely non-exhaustive but should give you enough signs to know when to break it off.