The Hard Times

• "Do You Plan On Having Any Kids?" Asks Friend Who Clearly Knows You Sleep On An Air Mattress, 8/23

Humor Darling

• Wow! Face Cream Wants Me To Be Confident, But Not Confident Enough That I Don't Need Their Product, 8/23

• Ahoy! Bachelorette Party Wastes No Time In Commandeering Party Boat At Sea, 8/23

• Summer In The City? Faint Smell of Hot Garbage Filling Air, 7/23

• 5 Straw Beach Hats That Say 'The Sun Completely Owns Me', 7/23

• Breaking: Noise Cancelling Headphones No Match For Sound Of Own Flip Flops, 6/23

• Genius? Woman Avoids Small Talk At Work By Using Invisibility Cloak, 5/23

• Humble Makeout Brag? Lipstick Mark Stays On Wine Glass After Dishwasher, 4/23

• Easter Egg Hunt Just Looking For Literally Any Affordable Egg, 4/23

• All-Female Team's Zoom Meeting Is Just Everyone Saying, "Oops, You Go Ahead", 4/23

• Artisan Bread Differentiates Self In Market By Getting MFA In Studio Art, 3/23

• Be Mine? Amazon Has Been Coming To The House Kind Of A Lot Lately, 2/23

• Woman Worried Candy Hearts Are Just Telling Her What She Wants To Hear, 2/23

• FEMA Introduces Relief Bill For People Who Were Foolish Enough To Try Pinterest Craft, 1/23

• BREAKING: Santa's Workshop To Partner With Amazon, Citing Faster Delivery Times, 12/22

• ‘I Saw Mommy Kissing Pete Davidson,’ and Other Holiday Jingles, 12/22

• Fashion Win? Woman Realizes She Is Wearing Same Puffer Vest as Yorkie on Subway, 12/22

• Airlines Gear Up For Busy Holiday Season By Offering To Lose Luggage A Month In Advance, 11/22

• Self-Care Incense Stick Slows Down Burn After Realizing Woman Still Hasn’t Mentally Collected Herself, 10/22

• Round of Monopoly Offers Realistic Home-Owning Fantasy for Married Couple, 10/22

• FEMA Introduces Relief Bill for People Who Were Foolish Enough To Try Pinterest Craft, 10/22

• Ryan Gosling Tries Method Acting For ‘Barbie’ Movie: Stands Idly in Dream House Until Needed for Make-Out Scene, 8/22

• Woman Panics After Acquaintence Takes Up Offer of “Getting Drinks and Catching Up” Sometime, 7/22

• Cold Button on Hair Dryer Offers Brief Reprieve Into Arctic Paradise, 7/22

• Washing Machine Setting Promises to Provide Sensual and Passionate Experience to Raggedy Old T-Shirt, 6/22

• Woman Who Needs Fan to Sleep Decided to Put Jumbo Jet in Bedroom, 5/22

• Woman Tired of Moving Convinces Renters She is Cool New Bonus Item, 5/22

• Woman Stares at Dumbbell for 5 Minutes to Manifest Abs, 5/22

• House Explodes After Protective Paper Towel Not Placed Over Microwaving Bowl of Chicken Soup, 5/22

• How To Stress Test Your MacBook by Opening as Many Internet Tabs as Possible, 4/22

• Company Slashes Retirement Plan to Introduce Cheaper Option: Check Old Pockets for Dollar Bills, 4/22

• Woman Resuscitates Shriveled-Up Contact for One Last Hurrah, 4/22

• Coworker’s Whole Personality Defined by Eccentric Patterned Socks, 3/22

• REPORT: Valentine Candy Hearts To Include Booty Call Text Phrases Such as ‘u up?’, 2/22

• Trader Joe’s Crew Member Wondering When They Get To Do Cool Pirate Shit, 1/22

• Old Exercise Bike Slated To Be Released to a Farm to Enjoy Last Days In Peace, 1/22

• Report: Woman Going To Take Extra Napkins Just In Case, 12/21

• Jesus Tired of Birthday Always Falling on Christmas – Says He Gets Shorted Gifts, 12/21

• Woman Moves Out Of Overpriced Apartment and Into Cozy Sweater, Says ‘It’s Way Roomier In Here, and It Was Only $15’, 11/21

• Wedding Party Organizes in V-Shape to Flock South for the Winter, 9/21

• Woman Caught Posting Stock Photos of Baby Just To Get More Likes, 9/21 

• Men Holding Fish In Profile Pics Discovered To Be Part of Some Type of Unclear Alliance, 8/21

• Doctor Warns Having 3 Espresso Shots A Day Leads To Actually Answering Phone Calls On First Ring, 8/21

• Man Grilling At BBQ Angry That Self-Created Nickname ‘Cheeseburger King’ Not Catching On, 7/21

• So, You Want To Log Into Our Complimentary Wi-Fi? Like Hell You Will, 7/21

• Zoom App Repeatedly Showing Up At Front Door Unannounced After In-Office Meetings Resume, 7/21

• Woman Left Skeptical After Improv Teammate Responds “Yes, And” To Her First Date Proposal, 6/21 

Alexa...WTF: A Comedy Revue of 2022

• Guest writer for monologue jokes, 12/22 Rock

McSweeney's Internet Tendency

• I Am A Patagonia Vest Warrior Who Crushes Digital Mountains Of Excel Spreadsheets, 12/19

The Boston Accent

• Local Orchard Teams Up With Dunkin To Offer First Ever Pick-Your-Own Pumpkin Spice Latte, 9/22

• Elton John Playing 'Bennie and The Jets' At Gillette Stadium Closest Thing To A Jets Victory There In Years, 7/22

• Touching Tribute: Revere Residents Leave Cherished Cigarette Butts In Sand To Keep Spirit Of Beach Alive, 7/22

• Foxboro Reacts To Hosting 2026 World Cup: 'We Can't Wait For Soccer To Finally Come To New England!', 6/22

• Boat Shoes Magically Appear On Man's Feet As He Crosses Bourne Bridge To Cape, 6/22

• When People Give Directions In Massachusetts, REEL, 5/22

Points In Case

• Yankee Candle Scents for Fall 2020, 10/20

• I Am the Tropical Destination on Your Desktop Background: Please Never Visit, You’re Too Boring to Come Here, 7/20

• Welcome Aboard C.U.L.T. Incorporated!, 11/19

The Belladonna Comedy

• Uh-Oh! Mommy’s Maternity Leave is Up!, 5/20

Weekly Humorist

• What I Imagine Happens When Your Tweet Goes Viral, 6/30

& more..