Who The F*ck Needs A Coaster When You Have This?

So, it happened. You got the dreaded "are you using a coaster?" at your friend's house after placing your beer right on their new mahogany coffee table like a total moron. Oh f*ckkk.

Present this coaster to let everyone know you in fact used using a coaster and are a highly refined house guest who wouldn't be caught dead without one. I mean, c'mon, you f*cking love coasters! Psht who WOULDN'T remember to use one?

If this doesn't work and they've discovered an emblazoned drink ring where your beer was resting, now is a great time to say "Wow, who put their beer here? Jeez ever hear of a COASTER?" and quickly run out of the house.

*Reuse coaster as needed

The Stunning Anatomy Of A Granola Bar

The allure of granola bars has captivated the general public for as long as granola has existed. This granola bar was generously donated by an avid hiker, who said "not to worry I've got about 15 more in my knapsack", which he did. It was then dissected in hopes of revealing the mystery behind what makes these sticks such a sought-after snack.

As the granola was examined, nothing of note was found. The granola bar's popularity remains a complete f*cking mystery. 15 minutes into the study, the granola bar had disintegrated into a pile of crumbs, at which point, the mixture was tossed outside. Moments later, a swarm of hikers and birds were seen snacking on what was left of this riveting study.

Introducing The Pocket-sized Saxophone

Looking to impress your friends with a cool theme song when you enter the room? Try The Pocket Sax. This virtual saxophone is perfect for any occasion that requires just a little something extra. Like waiting for breadsticks at The Olive Garden or when you need to fill the awkward silence on a first date. Just hit play and let The Pocket Sax take it away.